As an avid news junkie, I come across tons of stories and columns that I glance over and then continue on with my quest for the next great piece or breaking news story. But today I found one that I just couldn’t shake. It was on the site Madame Noire entitled “Ask A Smart Brotha: My Passion For The Pull Out Method“. Now according to the comments, a lot of people couldn’t believe what they were reading. I mean, endorsing coitus interruptus on a blog site targeted primarily at Black women? The same Black women responsible for the 73% out-of-wedlock birth rate among Black babies? Many people thought this piece went too far, but personally, I don’t think it went far enough!
For starters, who cares about children being born to unwed Black woman anyway? Especially when in some countries majority of kids will be born out of wedlock by 2016! Why waste time trying not to be a statistic when if we wait it out long enough, the statistics will catch up to us? Who knows, by 2175, more young Black men might finally be dying at the hands of white men than other young Black men. You know, like it use to be.
But after reading that bold, controversial, and courageous piece, encouraging us all to step up and embrace the pull out method while simultaneously quieting our minds on the risks of unprotected sex and unwanted pregnancy as long as we timed our coital dismount perfectly, it gave me the courage to finally offer up one of my many suggestions to the Black community that I have been holding onto for quite some time now.
I would like to introduce you to what I call the “Point and Take” method. It’s my own personal response to “Stop and Frisk” and though it’s not entirely legal, I think we can all benefit from it. The P&T method (as I like to refer to it in the streets) is when any Black person living in New York approaches any white person who may be in possession of something said Black person may want (iPhones, iPads, Louis bags, venti caramel mocha with light foam), points their gun in their face in a very aggressive manner (preferably sideways as to not break from the stereotype that all Black people brandish weapons this way) and takes the item from them before hurrying off. This has been scientifically proven to work and is almost 100% effective (seriously, look it up).
Now just to clarify, I am only a huge proponent of “Point and Take” when properly done. What I would consider a properly executed P&T is pretty much any time you both get what you were attempting to take and escape un-arrested. The key to the success of this method is knowing the exact right moment to pull yourself out of the situation before passers by and on-lookers get a good enough look at you to give to police. Stay in the P&T two seconds too long and it’s clink time.
You may be thinking “Travon, not only are you out of your fucking mind bat shit crazy, but you’re encouraging Black people to partake in a very risky activity that could very well ruin their lives and will sound very stupid when they attempt to explain their actions once the method has failed them” and to that I would say yes, you may be right. But remember, P&T should only be done by people who are most experienced in the method, preferably those who have been practicing it for years. You have to have racked up at least 10,000 hours of P&T according to Malcolm Gladwell’s “Tipping Point”, to be good enough to execute it properly or at least achieved boss status in every game in the Grand Theft Auto video game series.
It will take brave ideas and bold stances like those of the “Smart Brothas” and my own in order to move Black people to the forefront of society. Who cares if the pull out method is actually a bad idea or if P&T can get you “arrested” or “killed”. Stop being pussies! I hope this gives someone else courage to stand up for their bold new idea as well. Some of you might think I’m crazy or hate me for advocating things like this but remember, they tried to burn Galileo at the stake for his big ideas and now who has the egg on their faces?Follow @Travon